When your pregnancy isn’t planned, so much about the experience changes. As baby announcements and baby shower pictures scroll through your feed, you have to face the facts: You are not excited about your unintended pregnancy.
Maybe you are in school or just starting your career. You could have children at home and the thought of another baby feels overwhelming. This pregnancy could have happened after a one-night stand or at the start of a promising new relationship.
Whatever your circumstances, it’s okay to feel disappointed or even angry about your pregnancy. Your feelings are valid. But they don’t have to define your story.
As you process your feelings about this pregnancy, it may be helpful to reframe the situation. Use the tips we’ve included below to understand what this pregnancy truly means for your life and how to find your best next steps. You can—and will—build a beautiful future, despite this challenge. Don’t give up hope.
What if I’m not excited about my unintended pregnancy?
Know that it’s okay to be upset about your pregnancy
The most important thing to remember is that there’s no right or wrong way to feel about your pregnancy. Every woman’s experience is different. Your emotions may change every day or even every hour. And that’s okay.
In fact, most women who become pregnant unexpectedly feel a wide range of emotions. Fear, anxiety, anger, shame, sadness, hope, regret—the list goes on. These feelings may reflect your experience at this moment, but they don’t define you. And they shouldn’t define your pregnancy.
Feelings are valid, but they’re also temporary. They change with time, moods, and circumstances. Rather than basing your decision about your pregnancy on your feelings, it’s important to think about all your options. What resources are available to you? Who can support you through this? What choice do you truly want to make?
Finally, don’t panic. Take some time to process your emotions. Try journaling or meditating to sort through what you’re feeling. Talk with a trusted friend or family member about your pregnancy. You may never be excited about your pregnancy, but you can find peace in this situation.
Remember you’re not alone
Your unplanned pregnancy is not as uncommon as you might think. In fact, almost half of pregnancies are unexpected! That means hundreds of thousands of women face this same situation every year.
It also means that there are many organizations and people that are ready to help you thrive.
Our clinic offers free pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, STD testing/treatment, and options counseling. We can connect you with organizations that help with housing, education, food, and more.
Most importantly, you can find strength in a social support system. Don’t keep your pregnancy a secret. Turn to your parents, friends, siblings, and mentors. Share your doubts and fears. Our team at Thrive Orlando is also here to support you as you determine the best option for your pregnancy. We can even connect you with a local church or organization that can offer continued support.
You’re not in this alone. We’re here for you.
Try to avoid making assumptions
We have seen many women who assume that their partner will be upset about the pregnancy. Some think their partners will blame them for getting pregnant. They try to handle the situation alone to protect their partner and relationship.
Sadly, this can make a hard situation worse. Your partner may be afraid to give his opinion or to share what he wants for your future together. Many men think the woman doesn’t want to hear his thoughts. After all, it’s her body. He might say, “I’ll do whatever you want” in an attempt to be supportive. But that often makes women feel like all the pressure is on them.
Prevent misunderstandings and regret by talking honestly about the pregnancy. Share your desires, fears, and doubts with your partner. Don’t hold anything back. If you don’t make a decision together based on your true feelings, this may become your life’s biggest regret. You both may begin to resent the other for the pregnancy and the choice you made, which will likely destroy your relationship.
But, if you commit to making a choice together, one that meets both of your desires, you will feel confident in the decision and your future.
Take the time to explore all of your options
Do you feel forced into a specific option? Do you look at your circumstances and future plans and wonder how you could ever choose anything else?
We have seen many women who feel the same way. When they come to our clinic, they feel hopeless. But they find the answers they need here.
We help every patient explore all of their options. There may be resources that can help you overcome some of your obstacles. We can also make sure you understand all your options, answering any questions you might have.
You can find solutions to your obstacles. You have so many options and a bright future ahead.
Find confidence and relief at Thrive Orlando
We want every woman to leave feeling confident. No matter how unsure or hopeless you feel walking in, our goal is to help you find the best choice for you, a choice you won’t regret.
You don’t have to choose any option. You don’t have to live in fear, shame, and regret. Find the help and hope you need here.